Heather Hansen

Win With Words™ – What’s Your Communication Style?

“The jury has a verdict.”

Everything tingles like your nerves are on fire. Two years of pleadings, interrogatories, depositions, and trial have come to this. Your client stands by your side, waiting to hear the jury’s decree. Win, or lose? It seems to take forever for the courtroom to be ready to take the verdict. All of the lawyers have to return from their secret places where they’ve been wearing a hole in the floor with their pacing. The court reporter has to get back to the room and set up, untouched by emotion, a scribe for the jury’s word. You’ve got more than enough emotion to make up for her lack. For two years you’ve been your client’s advocate, using your words to speak for him and arguing on his behalf. Now, finally, you will hear whether your words were enough. The jury foreperson stands as you sit with your pen hovering over the first question on the verdict sheet. Win, or lose? Winning feels sweeter than nectar, and it rushes through your veins in much the same way. Losing feels like a little death, as you search for some meaning to make it better. When you win, you fill with tears of relief and pride while you squeeze your client’s hand. When you lose, you fill with tears of disappointment and surprise, as you squeeze your client’s hand. Win, or lose? There’s a lesson in every loss, a stepping stone that must be traveled on the way to the next win. You might need the lesson, but you’d have preferred the win. We all want to win.

And we all can. In the courtroom, every win comes at the expense of someone else’s loss, but in the real world that doesn’t have to be the case. To Win means to be successful, to be victorious. In life outside the courtroom, we can be successful without taking from another’s success, and we can be victorious without striking down another. Victory, success and winning begins with the words we use, with ourselves and with others. Words create reality, and when you know how to use your words to their highest potential, you become victorious. You truly can win with words, and the power to do so is in your hands.

What do you want?

Better relationships? That all starts with the words you use and how you use them.
Better health? I’ve maintained a 100 pound weight loss by changing the words I use when I talk to myself about food and exercise.
Better career? The words you use are what makes you a strong leader and a great colleague.
Overall happiness? It’s your birthright, often hidden beneath words like doubt, lack, insecurity and fear.
Change your words, change your life.

The way that each person can win with words differs, and different situations call for different tools. I’ve been fortunate enough to use words to win in a variety ways. I’m a trial attorney trained as an ADVOCATE–supporting my client’s cause with confidence, logic and tenacity. My psychology degree helped me to fulfill a lawyer’s role as a COUNSELOR-providing emotional support, nurture and empathy to my clients when they are struggling with their own foreign vulnerability. When I trained as a MEDIATOR, I did so to better see all sides of a situation, and to work towards an outcome that would leave everyone satisfied. And most recently, as an on air HOST, I’ve used words to entertain and engage an audience.

Each of us has some ADVOCATE, COUNSELOR, MEDIATOR and HOST within us. And there are situations where we need to use our words in different ways in order to win. When we know our personal communication style and how to hone it to its highest capacity, we can and will Win with Words.

When you learn how to Win with Words™ using your own personal style, the world opens up for you and victory is within reach. You’ve been given all the tools you need, and the Win with Words™ assessment will help you put them in your tool belt and know how and when to use them. This is the year you will communicate your way to bigger and better wins. I can’t wait!

Heather Hansen

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